Friday, February 03, 2006

Operation Delta "KINGS COTTAGE IDENTITY"

Guys, after a long time, am back to annachi vazhi. And this time around we have a different real life story of one of the most dangerous and lethal operations carried out by the KGB (kathir/Ganesan Bharathwaj) secret agency in rememberance of our beloved kadir who started it.

PART I

It was early morning 25th jan, a cold foggy day in bangalore, when bharathwaj, an engineer from HP received a call on his mobile. It wasnt the routine support calls from customer this time. It was quite different....in fact it was something he never thought should happen again. A long long story forgotten for good. All one could see was the glitter in his eyes. It meant danger, it meant anger, it meant assanination, it meant........DELTA IS BACK. He dint utter a word until finally he put the phone and his past flashed thru his mind like a small blue film (where he acted and directed). He just dint expect he had to become "JASON BOURNE BHARATWAJ" again.

With a quite smile he assured amritha that everything was fine and told that he needs to leave for coorg on a holiday trip soon with the other guys. Only he knew, why this trip was planned and why D0 and D0.5 had called him after all these years of long silence........


PART II
JASON BOURNE BHARATWAJ, the man no one dared to know, the greatest assasin of all times trained by kadir carlos the jackal (from gooduvaanjeri) himself, an image that all secret organisations feared, a name that was created to kill the top terrorists in the world........after all his years as a cold blooded assasin with operations in every corner of the world had left his name and fame behind for his wife Amritha (bharath used to sing , Iyengaar veetu azhage to cover her). But now, the people who created him RAJESH (D0) and BALLU (D0.5) had begged him to come back as DELTA 1 (D1) for the most dreadfull of all operation ,still undone and no one but BOURNE BHARAT (shortform) can execute this.

The mission was to plant some devices in the deep forests of coorg (where the enemies have established base) and to monitor the enemies activities. By no means should the enemy have a living witness for this operation. That means, DEATH to anyone who comes in between and DEATH to anyone who gets caught. The enemies need to be watched day and night and all their activities taped and presented to the higher D's. The enemies were the RED ASS MONKEYS which inhabited the deep forest of coorg. The tape should contain scenes of these monkeys mating, which D0 and D0.5 had to sell for an enormous money to discovery channel. None who have attempted this have ever succeeded without getting bitten by them.

The mission needed to be carried out at any cost. The best possible team had to be assembled asap.

PARTIII

The only thing running in D1's mind while he was sipping the not so good coffee was, who need to be used for this operation. The rest of the D's should be the top in the world and no compromises. And of course, the reward was excellent. Every D would get a "Veshti + 1 Kilo rice + 100 Rs in cash". What more could you ask, a lifetime settlement.

As D1 browsed the top secret profiles, he started naming his team. A team that would live and die on his command. A team that would kill anyone or anything to protect the secrets and destroy the enemy.

D2
Thats me. I would defer telling about me for the rest of the blog.

D3
Ram was D3. By and large, the most destructive living chemical weapon. A million times powerfull than saddams inventions and osama's network. He would kill a city with just a pair of socks, or maybe wipe out a small town with his baniyan. His body was an Akshaya paatram full of strong chemicals. No one dared to know or handle this kind of a human bomb better than D1. So, D3 was back and he had no mercy in his eyes.

D4
Iyan. The operation specialist from southeast. His major strength was his enterprising voice, spoken thru the nose and his killer tattoo on his right shoulder. He could fight a bull barehanded. The only man alive who can drink old monk and lick pickles simultaneously. His expertise with throwing stones was his major plus. D4 was in.

D5
Guru. The stunning looks of a rock star, the speed of a 100 year old turtle, the laugh of ram cruise. In all he was a walking hollywood R...E....M....O remo remo types. We neede him to cover any girls or women in between operation who could be dangerous. Just like james bond types. D5 cant be avoided.

D6
Suchi. The oldest of the lot. The only indian agent who screwed the CIA in a credit card game. Master of yoga and Dhandaals. Cuts of brucelee, muscle of Arnold Shivaajinagar and brains of...lets forget it. He was a one man army, a combat machine. D6 was called back to service after long years of retirement.

D7
Sesha. The communication specialist. Any form from the primitive tarzan shouts to the latest SMS. He could send an SMS with 24 characters in .065 seconds to anyone. Imagine, he says good morning at 12.01 sharp everyday. The communication speacialist was in.

D8
Driver Rajesh. Most stupid of all, he hardly knew to drive, but was a close associate of D3 and D5. He never likes to drive on the road and needs continuous supply of cig and liquor to keep up the speed. He was out transporter!!!!

Together with the team, D1 (JASON BOURNE BHARATWAJ, BLUE WHALE BHARATWAJ, PYTHON BHARATWAJ) was all set, armed to the teeth, and ready to leave with the puliyodarai and curd rice with pickles from amritha.

The instructions were repeated and the last words by D1 before boarding was "ALL THE D's, follow me".......we repeated "YES SIR" and we were off.....

To be continued

4 Comments:

Blogger APAM NAPAT said...

Ada paavingalaa driverkku en peraa irukanum

11:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sesha oda sms matter a appadiya suspense a eduthindu poran pathiya jacky and tour dictionary will never be complete with out the mention of cardamom biscuits. oru thool kuda mathavanuku offer pannama full kattu kattinan raman.

idhula nai kitta thallu machi vera, but i guess im wrong he did offer his machi some biscuit after he got water melon with chilli powder spread on it.

9:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry tour diary a tour dictionay ayuthiten.speeling mistake!!!

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ram's Pulugal

At Symphony's annual day. Ram, Kaushil and Me (bharath). The party started and dance floor was open.

Ram: Va da machaan, lets dance
Kaushik/Bharath: Illa da, we will stay here, but you go ahead and enjoy.
Ram: Ok guys!!
(Ram goes to end of the back stage and looks if we can see him from there. He thinks that he cannot be seen and starts dancing with one of those Service (cleaning) Girls there).

After some time of fun and frolic, Ram returns back..

Ram: Guys, it’s damn good. I think she is a Developer or QA. Must be 18, or 19, at the most 20 da. Looks like she is interested in me!!
Kaushik/Bharath: Is it? That's awesome...so, why don't you go and have some more fun.
Ram: Oh yeah, Just came to tell you that I am having good fun. ok guys, back in sometime.
Me to Kaushik: Dai, indha Service figure Ram ku Developer/QA ?
Kaushik: Mama, we will go there after 5 minutes and catch him RED HANDED..

After sometime, ram again returns and handovers his mobile, tag (that is all his dirty

accessories). Looks like they started stinking together!!

Ram: Guys, hold this for me, I will be back. Guys, there is lots of action happening

there!!
Bharath/Kaushik: Is it? Is she approaching you?
Ram: Hey, enna da pesara? We already are in love...she is flattered. Me too am, no time waste machann. See you guys. Will be back in sometime..

Me and Kaushik then go to the back stage and see Ram dancing with the Service Girl. RED HANDED!!

Me: Yenna da, Rama, idha attu figure kuda dance adinduruke?
Ram: Fuck illa da. I was dancing with her sister, she is a Developer cum QA in Symphony!!

Me and Kaushik had to drag and drop Ram in the Car and had him put him to a wash.

4:12 AM  

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